Mark Twain's Guide to Diet, Exercise, Beauty, Fashion, Investment, Romance, Health and Happiness by Mark Dawidziak

Author:Mark Dawidziak [Dawidziak, Mark]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781938849466
Publisher: Prospect Park Books

CHAPTER TWELVE

THE DELEGATE’S INTERESTING GAME.

from The Gilded Age (1873)

Finance & Investment

One of the most frequently quoted Twain lines on money matters is this gem: “A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.” It certainly captures the spirit of Twain’s thoughts on bankers, but it’s yet another line that comes up bankrupt in the attribution account. We can’t prove he didn’t say it, of course, but we have verification sound as a dollar bill for these:

There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.

—Following the Equator (1897)

All you need in life is ignorance and confidence, and then Success is sure.

—1887 notebook entry

There is an old-time toast which is golden for its beauty. “When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.”

—Following the Equator (1897)

Prosperity is the best protector of principle.

—Following the Equator (1897)

Few of us can stand prosperity. Another man’s, I mean.

—Following the Equator (1897)

He says that the primary rule of business success is loyalty to your employer. That’s all right—as a theory. What is the matter with loyalty to yourself?

—1901 speech

Honesty is the best policy—when there is money in it.

—1901 speech

Let your sympathies and your compassion be always with the underdog in the fight—this is magnanimity; but bet on the other one—this is business.

—quoted in Mark Twain: A Biography (1912)

by Albert Bigelow Paine

I find that, as a rule, when a thing is a wonder to us it is not because of what we see in it, but because of what others have seen in it. We get almost all our wonders at second hand . . . By and by you sober down, and then you perceive that you have been drunk on the smell of somebody else’s cork.

—Following the Equator (1897)

The lack of money is the root of all evil.

—quoted in More Maxims of Mark (1927)

Let us not be too particular. It is better to have old, second hand diamonds than none at all.

—Following the Equator (1897)

I consider that a broker goes according to the instincts that are in him, and means no harm, and fulfills his mission according to his lights, and has a right to live, and be happy in a general way, and be protected by the law to some extent, just the same as a better man. I consider that brokers come into the world with souls—I am satisfied they do; and if they wear them out in the course of a long career of stock-jobbing, have they not a right to come in at the eleventh hour and get themselves half-soled, like old boots, and be saved at last? Certainly—the father of the tribe did that, and do we say anything against Barabbas for it to-day? No! we concede his right to do it; we admire his mature judgment in selling out of a worked-out mine of iniquity and investing in righteousness, and no man denies, or even doubts, the validity of the transaction.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.